I am a failure - May 9 2016

Today was the big day; the day that I would wake up and succeed in my new schedule.  I had prepared mentally all weekend and even had been ramping up some things to get my mind and body somewhat used to the idea.  But when the time came, I hit the snooze button. 

I am not totally surprised, I have had a life long struggle achieving my goals, finishing my tasks etcetera.  I should clarify a little here, I have no difficulty completing things for other people, especially when it is things agree to do for them that I don't necessarily like or want to do, those things are a piece of cake for me.  However, for some self-defeating reason yet unknown to me, I have the most difficult time doing things for myself.  Most notably: things for my health or really important things.

So my huge plan to start today was, all things considered, a simple goal.  I was to wake up at 4:30 a.m. Take a light jog.  Stretch out and be ready to go to work at 6:00.  This was going to be the start to my new exercise routine that would include a polyphase sleep schedule and a better eating plan.  My regular schedule is to get up with about 5 minutes to get dressed, make food for the day and roll in to work between 5 and 10 minutes late (I say "Late" here but my work is pretty lax on that,  as long as I am there before 7:00 all is well, but my target has always been 6:30)

How it actually went today is that somewhere around 6:04 I realized that I had turned off all of the alarms I had carefully constructed to wake myself up.  So I missed my entire morning plan.  After sighing in personal defeat and gently whispering to my wife "I am a failure" I rolled myself out of bed and began my regular routine. 

Now there is a small triumph in this because I was able to get to work at 6:30 so I am slightly ahead of the "old way" and even though I fell shy of my lofty goal I can maintain a plan of incremental change.  I did do my morning stretching at my work and that is another advance.  I will maintain my eating plan and then my mid-day nap and wake up earlier tomorrow, see how that turns out.

On The Rocky Road - May 10 2016

Well, my plan went more according to itself yesterday.  I was able to maintain my diet and also successfully took my first nap and woke up with little trouble, I did not do any specific exercise because it was movie night with my family.  Also, I am trying not to spread myself too thin while I get my new schedule in order.

I did meet some trouble this morning when I attempted to get up after my second nap (the first one of the day really)  I had planned to take a short jog at 4:30 A.M. but I was met with physical resistance and ended up resetting my alarm clock till a little after 6.  This set me back and caused me to arrive at work later than I wanted to.

On the positive side of my plans though: I have been making it throughout the day without any use of coffee or soda for energy.  I have also been consistent with doing my morning "Tai Chi" routine ,even though it has been at work so far.

Tomorrow I will be even more successful.  I may not get up in time for my jog, but I will at least get up in time to do my morning stretch at home rather than hiding in the back of a warehouse.

A Little Better - May 11 2016

Yesterday afternoon I had to break schedule a little bit.  There were some important errands we had to run in town, and the nearest town is an hour away.  I managed to leave work a few hours early but still did bot arrive home until 7:00 P.M. which is the time that I am supposed to take first nap.  But when I get home I am also in the habit of playing my dogs tired (20 Minutes) and putting my daughter to bed (30 Minutes)  Also, I had the groceries to put up.  What this amounted to was that I didn't get to my nap till almost a full hour late, and to keep things even I got up an hour late so, in the end, not too big of a loss.

I realized over the last few days that my body is fighting falling asleep for about a half hour each time that I try to nap so I am going to begin laying down a half hour before my desired nap time.  Also, before my planned second nap (2:00 A.M. - 4:00 A.M.)  I spent about a full hour doing meditative breathing and stretching to wind my self down.  This helped me fall asleep much quicker when I laid down, and I also believe it is the reason I woke up as quickly.

I did fail at waking up right at 4:00 and stayed asleep till a bit after 5:00.  Then I stayed in bed awake for a while talking myself in and out of giving up on this whole plan completely.  In the end, I triumphed over my lazy brain and got out of bed at about 5:20 A.M.  This gave me enough time to stretch and prepare for work at a somewhat casual pace.  A pleasant change from the rushing ass in five minutes to do all I need to for work.

I am really positive about being able to be up early enough to start running before I go to work.  I also think that if I keep this up I will be doing so before this week is out.  However, this plan, though well intentioned, still holds a few variables yet to be seen.
First:  I am not sure how my body is going to handle a total of four hours of sleep a day once I am used to the sleep schedule.
Second:  Will running before I go to work energize me for the day or make me tired and cause my knees to hurt before the work day is over
Third:  I am curious to see if stretching twice a day is going to help with the various joints I have pains in.

The summation thus far is that I am making steady progress.  I still need to figure out what my exercise schedule is going to be but I have mentally been fitting the days into their potential workouts.  More to progress to come.

Set back - May 12 2016

Yesterday's afternoon nap was much longer than it should have been.  Instead of a two hours it was more like three and a half.  This was enjoyable but detrimental to forcing my body to adopt my schedule.  I wish sleeping was not so rewarding.  It makes this much more difficult.  After that though I was more energetic for my second block but I still am not doing many tasks during that time so it seems to drag a little before my morning nap.

My second nap did go quite well and I am still consistently getting up earlier from that.  This morning I had enough time to comfortably get ready, make my lunch, stretch out and get to work at just a little after 6:00 A.M.  further convincing myself that I can be jogging in the morning by the end of this week.

Thursdays typically are the day I go into town and have a sparring practice with other people who fight (SCA) but the timing sits right in the middle of my afternoon nap.  I plan to get my sleep schedule cemented in well.  Then I am confident that breaking it once a week will not completely throw me off the cart.

Just Kidding - May 5 2013

Due to certain circumstances I did go to my fighting practice yesterday.  I know that it was detrimental to my sleep plan but as for my exercise plan it was beneficial so I see it as a gain if not a complete neutral.  Not only did I have fun at the practice but I was able to work out a few things that I had been tying to figure out mentally.  It was good to have a physical platform in which to manifest some plans in that realm.

After arriving home, Sore and tired, I forced myself to stay up until 2:00 A.M. anyway so that I did in a way maintain that portion of my sleep.  The down side being that I slept longer so I was unable to do my morning stretch before I went to work.  This puts back my plan of running by the end of this week but as a form of punishment I have resolved to run before work next Monday, no matter what.  That may mean that I just run to the end of my road and back and am later to work than I would like, but nonetheless, I will begin that schedule fresh next week.

In other news I am a little worried about the health of my intestinal tract.  I will not go into explicit detail as to why I am worried but I feel it is justified.  I have resolve to begin a written log of all of the food and water that goes into me (and when) and also when and what comes out of me.  Hopefully this will shed light into my problems and also it will help me to have a visual representation for when I start on my new diet.

Cheater - May 14 2016

Yesterday could only be described as a cheat day.  I didn't even attempt to do anything resembling my sleep schedule.  I also chose to drink a bottle of whiskey.  I suppose I could call it my last go before I fully commit to the new way.  Two more days till that starts so it looks like this weekend will be a lot of mental preparation. 

Preprared - May 15 2016

Yesterday was mostly a rest day.  I had some traveling out of town (moving boxes to prepare for our cross-country move) so I was really unable to get much done in the way of sleep schedule or exercise.  I also severely cheated my diet as we were lured by the temptation of Wienerschnitzel.  Which is essentially heartburn with a side of cardiac arrest.  My fingers are crossed to have the will on Monday to begin my real schedule.  Here is hoping!

Success!! - May 16 2016

      Well, it is Monday. The day that I set a goal to begin my schedule which includes running in the morning.  Before I go into detail of how this morning turned out I need to re-cap yesterday afternoon.  Being Sunday I usually have a leisurely day but instead I started off right with two separate call-ins for work.  All fine and good but it gets me moving earlier than I had planned.  After that I decided to go workout.  I spent an hour and a half doing drills and bag work.  Got a good sweat and figured out a few things I had been imagining. This all put me back at my house by around 1:00 P.M.  at which time I got to hang out with my daughter while my wife went for a walk with our oldest dog Beatrix.  Upon her arrival I committed to a comfortable, casual shower where I did some meditation and stretching.  Afterward I promptly took a nap from 4-7.  That really got me energized for the remainder of the day, despite having only planned to nap for one hour.
     For the rest of the day I did some work on a few music projects I had been putting off, did some work on KOTR (love that game!!) and read a little.  All in all it was a productive evening.  I finished with a good stretch out before sleeping at 2:00 A.M. right on schedule.

     And then Monday came.  I am happy to report that not only did I get up just a little after 4:00A.M. but that I was able to go for a run.  It was only for about ten minutes but it was a straight ten without stopping to walk.  I then had enough time to stretch out and prepare for work.  I even had enough time to do a brief meditation before leaving.  I did arrive at work a little later that I wanted but I still was there before 6:30 and before anyone else had arrived.  I am very happy with the day so far.  However, I must be cautious not to let this slight triumph distract me from the continuing goal.  This was only a small step in the right direction.  I am more optimistic than every.

Voluntary Loss of Momentum - May 17 2016

Yesterday I made a decision for a greater good.  My wife and daughter are leaving town for a few days so I slacked on my schedule to spend more time with them before the left.  Essentially I just skipped my afternoon nap yesterday evening.  However, that spilled over to this morning.  I did get up at 4:00 as the plan dictates but due to some extenuating circumstances I was unable to go for a run, or get to the other things I aught to be doing in the morning.  I arrived at work at the regular time and had to do my stretches there.

Since I will be alone for a few days though I have better opportunity to continue my schedule.  Time will reveal how this all plays out.